Toddlerisms: S%&* Happens

I wrote this post yesterday but since I post Mad About It Mondays, I saved it until today…

Poop Happens Onesie

Nap avoidance is something every toddler does and I’m certain there is not a single parent out there that’s immune to it. Lately, C has been trying everything in the book to avoid naps. She’ll throw everything out of her crib and then cry for her blankets and binky, she calls for my husband and me, she’ll ask for food or water, and most recently started lying about pooping so that we’ll come and get her from her crib. When she first started proclaiming, “I pooped!” from her crib, we would (like the suckers that we are) always go check only to discover that she had not. One clever little trick she learned was taking all of her clothes off (diaper included) and so we started putting her onesies underneath her clothes.

Fast forward to last Thursday when my husband forgot to put a onesie on her before bed. Like she does, she stripped down to her birthday suit from her waist down (unbeknownst to us) and finally fell asleep in her crib, underneath her covers. At some point in the middle of the night my husband brought her from her crib into our room (this is common in our household) and somehow did not notice that she was missing her pants and her diaper. I was going to deliver some home cooked meals to my dad (he lives a couple of hours from us) since he had surgery earlier that week and so I quietly got up before C so I could get myself ready for the day. Leaving only about fifteen minutes to spare before we needed to leave, I got C out of bed and discovered that she wasn’t wearing clothing. Thankfully our bed was dry and clean (I assumed she’d taken her clothes off in our bed) but then I noticed that she had something on her legs.

It wasn’t until I brought her to her room to get her changed that I discovered the terrible surprise that was waiting for me…she had pooped and peed all.over.her.crib. Needless to say we had to delay our plans to leave until the situation could be taken care of. I was livid. How could my husband forget something so simple as her onesie? Our morning was disastrous. When my husband and I sat down later that night we had a heart-to-heart about what had happened and how we could avoid things like that in the future.

This weekend was incident free. Today is another story all together…

Sometimes I think our children teach us valuable lessons about life. Today I learned something. Here I was on Thursday so unbelievably angry with my husband because he had forgotten something and I held him personally responsible for my rough morning.

This afternoon C would not nap. I tried everything I could think of to get her to settle down and sleep to no avail. Finally I threw in the towel, put her in her crib and shut her door. The first few minutes she tried her usual tricks, “Mommmmmmmy!!!!! Eat! Eat! I pooped!”. Armed with the determination to win the nap time battle, I ignored her. To my surprise, it worked! Or so I thought…

When I went in to do some laundry I noticed that she was still awake. Not only was she still awake but she was also naked. Not only was she awake and naked but she had, indeed, pooped. Not only was she awake, naked, and poopy but it was also everywhere…and it was the most foul-smelling moment I can remember.

Let this serve as a public apology to my husband for having been so angry last week…I’m sorry. Shit happens.

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5 thoughts on “Toddlerisms: S%&* Happens

  1. Cindy says:

    Oh my goodness! My C does some of these SAME tricks! She thankfully has never actually pooped in her bed…but I am scared to death that is coming! I was laughing as I read this, not because your plight was funny to me, but because I KNOW the frustration you are feeling and sometimes I have to laugh so that I won’t cry! Hang in there and know you are not alone in this fight!

  2. Samantha says:

    So far I haven’t experienced anything like this – I’m still hoping I never do – so gross! I used to babysit at a foster home where they had twin 18 month old girls who could shoot poop out the back of their diapers… ucky, ucky, ucky…

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