Denzel Washington Takes On Russian Mafia Inside Home Improvement Store: Wins.

The Equalizer

I guess it’s true what they say in that you never really do know who’s working at your local Home Depot home improvement store and that’s the whole premise (just kidding, it’s not) of “The Equalizer”, which hit theaters nationwide this weekend. The movie stars Denzel Washington (master of badassery) so I’m really not too worried about spoilers (we all know he’s a winner, both in real life and in his movies) but if you are, I would encourage you to skip on down to the very bottom of this post (just past the last picture). You’re welcome.

The Equalizer

Release Date: Friday September 26th, 2014

Total Running Time: 131 Minutes

MPAA Rating: Rated “R” for strong bloody violence and language throughout, including some sexual references

Cast: Denzel Washington, Chloë Grace Moretz, David Harbour, Marton Csokas

The Equalizer

“…The old man’s gotta be the old man – the fish gotta be the fish – you’ve gotta be what you are in this world…”

Robert McCall is a mysterious and meticulous man living a seemingly ordinary life in Boston. His days are spent working at his local Home Depot home improvement store (If it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it’s probably Home Depot, but it seems like maybe they didn’t want to pony up the dough for brand placement in the movie, so let’s just call it “Home Mart”). McCall doesn’t sleep much so his nights are spent reading his way through 100 books at Bridge Diner but, like any good movie, everything is not as it seems.

Bridge Diner

It’s at Bridge Diner where Robert befriends Teri (Chloë Grace Moretz), a young girl who is involved in a human trafficking ring.

{Human trafficking is a very real and very serious issue. For more information, please visit: http://www.humantrafficking.org/combat_trafficking} 

The-Equalizer-First-Trailer

“The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.”

After discovering Teri’s involvement in a Russian human trafficking ring, McCall decides to do something about it and “The Equalizer” is born. In an epic moment of vigilantism, The Equalizer unwittingly opens Pandora’s Box and takes on the entire (East Coast) Russian mafia throughout the remainder of the film. The Equalizer, in true Denzel Washington form, kicks a lot of butt and says some great things like: “When you pray for rain you gotta deal with the mud, too.”

The Equalizer, in all his glory, is nothing short of amazing. He’s the guy you want on your side if anything goes wrong and I promise, you’ll never look at a sledgehammer or a nail gun in the same way again. The final battle scene (it was a battle, okay?!) was so epic is had me questioning my post apocalyptic plans to live inside Costco (I’m now thinking Home Depot Home Mart might be a more viable option).

NoSpoilers

“The Equalizer” is an action packed ride that really does keep you on the edge of your seat throughout the film (even with an ending you can see coming – – that’s not a spoiler!). It’s got cheese, like any good vigilante action film, but it’s the kind of cheese you can thoroughly enjoy (at least I did).  Like Gouda.

Overall on the It’s An Ordinary Blog movie review scale from one to ten where one is the worst, five is the best, and ten is the worst again: I give “The Equalizer” a 4.3439839581 with an emoticon based sub-ranking of “Great! Now I’m going to question the background of every single person working inside Home Depot Home Mart. Are you REALLY here to sell me lumber or are you a former secret agent?!”

 

 

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One thought on “Denzel Washington Takes On Russian Mafia Inside Home Improvement Store: Wins.

  1. richard leverette says:

    I haven’t watched this show since they replaced the older daughter and brought in the annoying deadbeat dad guy… so I really just watched season 1. That said, I’ve been watching Home Improvement on DVD and it’s fun to see this clip.

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